Dejavu

I remember when I was still in the seminary, during the assessment period, I had a weird feeling. It was already the culmination of the second year and I have reached the pick of my ability. I completed the requirements for school, not just completed but highly commendable works, I have developed my skills ready for 'on the job' training (the IIP)and all the positive traits that can be said to me by my colleagues. However, on the irony of that, I felt somehow unsatisfied, feeling that there is still lacking and missing. The same i feel right now.

I have adjusted to my new environment and the same I have surpassed the expectations and even overtook others in terms of intellectual grasping ability that is due to my experience as an edge. However, I don't wish to be so confident to the extent that I might forget that I am still in the beginning of what i am presently pursuing. Nonetheless, I can still feel the emptiness, that something that which is lacking. sometimes I feel happy whenever my soulmate is exchanging messages with me or when we are together. But when we are both busy, I feel bored, I feel uncomfortable.

If i would compare this to the similar past experience, I feel like another event or encounter might happen either for me or against me.


why?why?why?
why not?


may God be with me always.